How Anger Coaching Helps
Anger coaching offers a wide range of differences over anger management. Both approaches stem from Cognitive-behavioral therapy. Anger is a raw emotion that causes pain and suffering. The individual who is angry suffers, as well as loved ones. Traditional therapy does little to address the how the body experiences anger. The process of anger management requests individuals “manage” his or her anger effectively. Anger coaching helps you determine how anger is manifesting in your life at the moment. Why is the anger here? Additionally, with anger coaching, we can determine how this is serving you in the moment. Furthermore, a good anger coach co-creates ways to increase your awareness behind what anger is trying to tell you. Easier said than done, right?
Anger is also a way we make sense of our world. Anger is how we address many of life’s frustrations. If we are angry at work, usually we are angry at home. If the kids make us mad, more than likely, our spouse makes us mad as well. This cycle tends to repeat itself over and over again throughout our lives. This anger can begin to erode the family from within and DOES NOT required Cognitive–behavioral therapy to manage. Anger coaching can help you more than you might be aware.
Best Therapies to Address Anger
There is no one perfect method to work with anger. Cognitive-behavioral therapy teaches those with anger to redirect behaviors and identify negative thought patterns. Using this method redirects negative behaviors or thoughts to good ones. Cognitive-behavioral therapy fails to see how anger erupts quickly. Cognitive-behavioral therapy refers to this as “Stress-Inoculation.” This process tries to expose one to the situation that makes them angry, then helps the individual self-monitor to relax. Anger coaching is more beneficial than Cognitive-behavioral therapy in this regard. Anger coaching helps you to determine where anger resides within your body.
Cognitive-behavioral therapy’s success finds a struggle in the approach to helping those with anger. You can’t think through every situation. This is mainly due to how we experience ourselves when we are mad and the words we say about ourselves when we are mad, and the messages we hear from others. A strong coaching approach helps to identify these patterns and create new ways of walking in the world. To help illustrate this further, think of a time you were angry. Can you identify what phrases you said to yourself or what did you hear from your partner? How did you keep the anger alive? What are new ways you can imagine that can reduce the tension you might be feeling? To put it in another way, anger coaching will help you see better ways to communicate.
What is Anger Coaching
Using strategies learned in anger coaching, you’ll learn it is a process that involves speaking with a confident anger coach. Typically, an anger coach has been through the journey of anger to better co-create alternatives with you. As individuals experience anger, it is largely due to a reaction to a situation, usually some form of injustice in our world. Most of us who suffer from anger cannot differentiate between how anxiety feels versus how anger feels. When I say feel, I mean literally. How does anger feel in your body? Utilizing anger coaching, you will be able to discover that anger might feel like a tightening of your jaw, a tension in your back or shoulders, or even tightened butt cheeks as you were driving down the highway. Moreover, anger coaching is a way to better understand how these sensations inform our world.
My role in anger coaching, brings awareness that people all experience anger differntly. What I notice in anger coaching is anger has a different story behind the reaction. Cognitive-behavioral restricts the ability to understand anger through story. Anger coaching helps to partner with you to understand the story better. When we become angry or nervous or even scared, our bodies react in a particular way. For example, have ever experienced someone jumping out at you from a dark room: I bet your entire body shook! Your bodily reaction is by design. Flight, fight, or freeze is the body’s ability to respond to a threat. This process helps protect us or helps us react if needed. Further frustrating the response is when we are continually at a heightened level.
Anger Coaching as a Way of Re-learning
Anger coaching offers you a clearer insight into how you are reacting. This is not in any way therapy, which aims at undoing childhood or significant life trauma. Cognitive-behavioral therapy works better for those who need help to refocus negative feelings, rather than anger coaching. Anger Coaching focuses on real results. Yes, you could have had a difficult childhood, but as you sit here today reading this, how are you allowing this to be who you are and how you walk in the world? From my experience, we as humans react to numerous situations in the same manner. When my partner doesn’t hear me, I typically roll my eyes. When my kids tell me a lie, I typically roll my eyes. Additionally, these bodily reactions reinforce my pattern of anger.
Often, we feel justified in our anger. Anger coaching allows for a new insight by co-creating with an anger coach to help understand how this entitlement is surfacing. Anger coaching informs who we are and how we want to react. Not everything stems from childhood. Childhood is most likely the place that started all this, but why are we still reacting as if we are in childhood?
If you’re ready to increase your awareness of how you react in anger, consider working with certified coach as a way to explore this behavior. Schedule your free consultation today.
Jeremy R. Allen, Coach
Son. Husband. Father. Coach.
www.jeremyrallen.com
jeremy@jeremyrallen.com
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